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Tell Me About Yourself

Are you preparing for an interview?  Getting ready to network?  You know one of the first things you’ll be asked is: “Tell me about yourself.” 

 

In the face of that question, often all of the great and glorious things you have ever done fly right out of your head.  Or you start listing your accomplishments since kindergarten and the person is sorry they asked.   

 

The challenge becomes learning how to answer that question in a brief and brilliant way.   

 

When I conducted my first few admissions interviews ten years ago, I made the mistake of asking open-ended questions like, “Tell me about yourself.”  What was meant to be an ice-breaker often took candidates 10-15 minutes to answer.  In a few extreme cases, it took 20 minutes in a 50-minute interview.

 

Later, I wised up and inserted the word “briefly.”  Though the responses became shorter, all I got were verbal versions of applicants’ resumes.  Over the subsequent ten years, I have learned that very few people, no matter their seniority and industry, know how to answer that question in a brief and brilliant way.

 

To most interviewees, this universal opening question is an obstacle rather than an opportunity. If you want to answer it in a way that will intrigue your interviewers and set the tone for the interview, all you need is two simple principles.   

 

1. Most people know that interviewers are subconsciously looking for candidates whose background and qualifications remind them of their own. (For a fascinating research on this topic, check out this article on Dr. Lauren Rivera's work).  The question is what can you, as an interviewee, do about it?  Answer: Find a way to connect over a shared experience.

 

 

 

2. Remember that your interviewers don’t understand your work history the way you do. The problem for many people trying to tell their story is the “curse of knowledge.”  That is the idea that once you know something, it is nearly impossible to imagine what it is like NOT to know it.  You know your personal history and career progress, but your interviewers don’t.  It all might make perfect sense to you, but to your interviewers it is like scattered dots without any discernible pattern.  They need you to connect the dots and reveal the hidden image.

 

The best way to put these two principles into action is by telling a story. Not just any random story, but one that features you as the star, includes structure and intention, and makes a connection with the others in the room.

 

 

Like any good story, your response to “Tell me about yourself” should be framed in three parts.

 

 

Part I: Think of a specific incidence in your life that involves an experience others can relate to.  It could be anything—a teacher who believed in you, a family dinner, a summer road trip, or a neighborhood bully.

 

 

Part II: Tell your interviewers what this incidence meant to you, personally.  How it shaped you or how you developed from it. 

 

 

Part III: Tell your interviewers what this incidence will mean to them and the organization they are representing.

 

 

Let’s read through this example by author, motivational speaker and speech writer, Kelly Standing, who worked with us on her response.  I will de-construct her story afterwards and see how it fits into the 3-Part framework.

 

*******

Tell Me About Yourself.
By Kelly Standing

 

Life has knocked me around … a LOT … but I’m one of the happiest, most resilient people you’ll ever meet. The bumps and bruises started early. When I was six years old, the neighborhood bully used my own jump rope to hang me from a tree by my neck! He left me there to die … just dangling, with my little red Keds barely off the ground. [PAUSE]

 

Fortunately, my dad came along and saved me just in time.

 

I’m sure, at the time, all the typical questions crossed my dad’s mind … “Who DID this??!” … “Where IS he?” … “Where’s my baseball bat?!” … [HUMOROUSLY] “How quickly can I clobber the kid and hide the evidence?”

But my dad, the Eagle Scout, asked an even better question. … a question that would SAVE the day instead of beating up the bully and making matters worse. My dad asked himself, “How will my daughter remember this?” … He forced himself to focus on what REALLY mattered to him in that moment — me.

 

“Will Kelly see herself as a victim, with a bully hiding behind every tree, waiting to string her up by her neck? … or … “Will she see herself as strong, resilient, able to handle anything that comes her way?”

 

That series of questions changed EVERYthing. On that day, my dad convinced me I was the “luckiest little girl on our block.” He convinced me that, “Your scars make you MORE beautiful, not less so. Your scars tell your story.”

 

From that one episode I learned to ask good questions. Later, I went on to the University of Missouri School of Journalism, where they taught me even more about asking good questions. That’s what I do for my clients today … I bring a journalist’s curiosity and an Eagle Scout’s ingenuity to their business problems. I help them tell new stories about themselves. I help them see possibilities where they might see only pain. I help them ask better questions.

 

***

 

Part I of Kelly’s story began with the incidence where her neighborhood bully hung her from a tree, and ended with her dad saving her just in time.  The actual story was a lot longer than the two short paragraphs that it took her to tell us.  In fact, the entire story is written in a chapter of her memoir, “I’m Still Standing.”  But in an interview situation no one has the luxury to use up that much time, so she has to be brief.

 

The brilliance comes in Part II and III.

 

In Part II, she tells us how her dad handled the aftermath of the situation and what he taught her about the situation.  She embraced his approach whole-heartedly.  Her story is every-parent’s-nightmare, but more importantly, she did not dwell on what actually happened.  Instead, she talks about what it has meant to her, personally.

 

In Part III, Kelly talks about how she has leaned to ask good questions since that incidence.  In fact, she went to journalism school where they taught her even more about the craft of asking good questions.  Notice here how she tucks in her credential.  Her qualification all of a sudden makes a great deal of sense and is very memorable.  Most importantly, she highlights one of the values she will bring to her interviewers and their organization: Asking good questions where people only see pain.

 

Does she have more to offer than that?  Of course!  In fact, she has so many more stories to tell that she wrote a fabulous book about her many brushes with death and how she perservered.  It's called, "I'm Still Standing" Each of us has countless biographical and professional data points.  Deciding which small sub-set of data is most relevant and compelling to share is crucial and where our expertise comes in.

 

Working together, Kelly selected this jump rope story (though doesn’t convey the full range of her skills and experiences) that intrigued her interviewers, set the tone, and invited interviewers to follow up with other good questions.  And this is much, much more effective than regurgitating your resume. So, using these principles and this structure, how would you re-craft your response to the question “Tell me about yourself?”  

 

How to respond to "Tell me about yourself" is just one example of many ways the Leadership Story Lab can help you leverage everyday business communication to tell your authentic and strategic stories.  Contact us and let us help you translate data on your cv, relate them to your audience, and persuade them to follow you!

 

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